I can't believe it's been two days since we've posted. Sorry! They keep us pretty busy with various appointments and sight-seeing, and in between those there is food to eat and naps to take.

And actually, we had a pretty rough day yesterday. Our little treasure is beginning to realize that we're here for good, and while the bonding has been real and wonderful, there is sadness in her from missing her foster mom. The grief came out yesterday as we experienced several sad tantrums, but not because of defiance but because of simply not knowing what to do with the sadness she feels, yet joy at the same time. You can tell that she feels sadness over missing her foster family, yet joy over having a mama and baba. During the tantrums yesterday, we just did our best to speak gently, to hold her when she'd let us, to sing to her, and to tell her that we love her and that we're never going to leave her.

During one of the grieving times, she cried herself to sleep, and then I let my tears flow as I knelt beside her crib and prayed for her. She was abandoned at four days old, with an extremely painful arm (brachial plexus injury), then placed in an orphanage, then three weeks later placed in a foster family. Then 18 months after that, placed with her mama and baba - us. This is a lot to go through. Can you imagine? Yet I praise God that now she can grieve and we can be here to tell her that it's going to be OK and that we will never let her go. This is our greatest privilege and honor.

After going through such a hard day yesterday, I saw and felt an even deeper bond between the three of us today. I know there was some level of healing yesterday, and I am grateful that we got to be the arms that held her as she both screamed and cried. This my precious daughter. And today, she looked at me deep in the eyes with those dark chocolate eyes like she hasn't yet before, for several minutes, and I could see something in her that was more relaxed and content. This is our beloved Abigail Mei. I just can't say it enough - we are so completely in love with this child.

1 comment:

  1. I'm crying with you as I read this. We knew it would happen, I was just praying it wouldn't. But, it's good for her to grieve & you are so right- its great that you now get to comfort her. These precious weeks with her there are perfect to gain her trust, show her your unending love & deepen the bonds. Loving & praying for you all during this journey! Xoxo